Loki the Scrooge
by Knuxle
Summary: Loki is visited unexpectedly by an old "friend"


"Are you almost ready?" Jane called impatiently, "By the time we get there, all of the fruitcake will be gone!"

"_I doubt it." _Thor thought, shivering at the remembrance of the putrid mortal delicacy. The very thought of the dry cake seemed to urge him to vomit, but he managed to shout, "Yes, I am nearly prepared, but this long piece of fabric you told me to wear does not seem to…fit…"

Jane had a moment of panic, and rushed into the bedroom, where Thor sat on the bed, frustrated, and looking almost identical to the Christmas tree in the dining room, if neckties were tinsel. He had dug through the closet, and found about twenty, which he had tied together like a long chain, and proceeded to wrap himself in, like a caterpillar in a cocoon.

"Mortal fashion is…strange," Thor said, frustrated, "and quite uncomfortable."

Jane was speechless. She wanted to laugh, but not hurt his feelings, so she choked, "Untie those, take ONE and I'll show you how to put it on." Then, she left the room, waiting once again for Thor to finish getting ready.

Fifteen minutes later, Jane entered the room again, to find neckties strewn all over the floor, and Thor holding one in his hand (which looked very cramped from tying, and then untying the ties). The tie was lined with thick stripes, and each stripe had a different memorable scene from the famous cartoon "How the Grinch Stole Christmas", which, of course, Thor had never heard of, let alone seen.

As Jane tied the necktie, she chuckled to herself that she, who had never worn a tie in her life, knew how to tie it better than a man.

"Are you mocking me?" Thor asked, somewhat offended.

Jane shook her head, and laughed, "I'm just...never mind."

Finally, the tie was perfect, and even matching Thor's pinstriped, crimson shirt (which was very impressive). The couple headed out the door and closed it behind them. They were instantly hit with the bitter, winter chill, and instinctively shuttered as they stepped into the cold. Not many creatures were about, but the occasional bird would be heard rustling in the trees, and the quiet coo of a pigeon. It was around evening, but because it was winter, the sky had already begun to darken, and was now a deep orange tarp, draped across the sky to block the sun.

Thor had insisted upon walking to the Christmas Party at the mansion, for his fear of cars still lingered. Unfortunately, the mansion was about five miles away.

"Thor, why can't we just drive to the party? My feet are sore!" Jane protested as they were half a mile away from the house. Luckily, they were going downhill, but the sidewalk was very uneven, and difficult to walk on.

"I was not the one who decided to wear daggers beneath my feet," he remarked, staring at Jane's high-heels, "However, if you wish, we may take a boous."

Jane stopped short. "A what now?"

"A boous." Thor replied, as if it were obvious, and everyone knew what a boous was.

"Do you mean...a BUS?"

"I suppose so," Thor said, but he seemed a little frustrated that he was proven wrong, "Are we going to take the...thing...or are we going to walk?"

Jane opened her mouth to demand taking a bus, but quickly closed it to see Thor's disappointed expression. Instead, she sighed, "Let's keep walking,". She reached out, took his hand, and they continued on downhill.

Loki glowered at the mansion before him. Of course, his _brother_ had talked him into coming to this strange party with the mortals, who (though he doubted it) had forgiven him. In his mind, he criticized the architecture of the manor, but reluctantly he strode up to the gate. It was jet black, iron, and if anyone wanted to sit on it, they would be punctured in a very unpleasant manner. Despite its seemingly historical design, a small screen arose from the top, and showed a small circle, and a hole in the top for a camera view.  
"Identify yourself," a calm, British voice said.  
"You know who I am," Loki retorted, coldly.  
"Identify yourself," the same voice commanded again.  
Annoyed, Loki kicked the fence, and shouted, "LET ME IN METAL MORTAL!"  
"I ask that you do not harm Mr. Stark's property, or he will have to escort you away from the facility,"  
"Mewling Quimm..." Loki grumbled, but placed his thumb on the screen. Then, the screen lit up a bright green, and the gate swung open.  
He trudged up the sidewalk, and began to unbutton his long, black coat. To his surprise, many small lights had been strung around the mansion, and candles sat in the many windows. Larger lights lined the sidewalk, and their glows reflected off of the light snow that had fallen softly on the grass. Despite how frustrated he was with Tony's security system, Loki could not help but enjoy the scene. Always, growing up, snow and ice had been such a negative thing, but here, the mortals cherished it, and looked forward to the first snowflakes fluttering to the earth. Even now, in his own mind, Loki saw snow and ice to be negative and...well...rather provoking, but the sparkling and glistening of the snow and ice from the lights gave it a positive aura, and warmed him on the inside, even if it was -4o outside.  
Sadly, that feeling soon melted away like a snowman in the microwave, when Bruce Banner answered Loki's knock on the door. If he already was not pale, Loki turned a ghastly white.  
"Loki!" Bruce exclaimed, surprisingly genuinely excited, "We're glad you could make it! Come inside where it's warm, you'll feel a lot better!"  
"Eh...yes...very well." Loki said, uneasily. Though he was positive Thor had entirely forgotten about his wrong-doings, he felt as though it was unlikely that Bruce did not hold a grudge, and a very strong one at that. However, he stepped inside the mansion. Only now did he notice that his stomach was in a knot. This was to be the first friendly encounter with the Avengers since the "incident". He would receive glares from everyone (with the exception of Asgard, who had done more than forgiven him by now) once he was let out of prison. Now, he somewhat wished he could be back in that cold, depressing cell rather than facing The Avengers, kindly.  
Bruce proceeded to lead Loki into the living room, where most of the guests had gathered around and were playing Christmas-themed Monopoly. When Loki entered the room, they all fell silent. Clint's eyes grew wide and he clung to Natasha, who sat next to him.  
Now, Loki was sure that he had lost so much color, he was entirely transparent. He could not say anything. It was as if he had his throat and lips clamped together. That feeling was not new to him...  
Tony finally broke the heavy silence, "Oh, hey there Loki!" he exclaimed, clearly having one too many drinks. He turned to the Avengers, and explained, "I really wanted him to come to the party, and Thor wanted him to come, and so...he's here. Wanna play Monopoly with us?"

Clint suddenly squealed, "You know, now, I don't really feel like playing. Excuse me, but I have to use the restroom!" he steadily rose to his feet from the leather couch, and inched his way around Loki, keeping as much distance as possible, before dashing into the hallway.

Reluctantly, Loki took Clint's place next to Natasha, who scooted noticeably to her right, away from him.

"Don't feel bad Loki, but you're gonna have to be the present," Tony said as he stumbled back to his seat, " 'cause I'm being Santa, Cap is being the elf, Natalie is the train, bird man WAS being the tree, and Bruce is being the reindeer. If I'd known that you were actually gonna show up, I would've let you be the reindeer." he gave a smirk, and handed Loki the small metal piece.

"Oh no...that's quite alright..." Loki mumbled, despite how furious he was with these mocking wenches.

"Where's Thor?" Steve asked quietly. All eyes turned to Loki, who felt like punching all of them.

"I DON'T KNOW." Loki replied, through his teeth.

"Oh well." Tony shrugged, "it's your turn Mr. Lovely."

Loki grabbed the dice, and threw them on the board. He did not even care that he did not know how to play. He made his move, did whatever crap he had to, and then handed the dice off to Bruce, who was to his left. The game continued, and each turn, Tony called Loki a different name. Steve's eyes darted as he sensed what he was leading up to. Finally, on Loki's eighth move, Tony said, "Make your move reindeer games."

That was just about enough for Loki. He grabbed the nearest two ends of the game board, and sent it flying across the room. "YOU SHUT UP, WENCH!"

Tony suddenly fell silent. Once again, all eyes were on Loki, burning through his soul, or seemingly so. Suddenly, a knock came on the door, and it was so on-cue, that it was almost laughable (though this was certainly not the time for laughter).

Bruce rose from his seat, and walked calmly to the door.

Bruce opened the door, and standing on the dark blue doormat was one smiling face, and the other being completely hidden in a scarf.  
"Mr. Banner!" Thor exclaimed, reaching through the doorway and clasping Bruce's shoulder, "I am so honored to be at this wonderful establishment tonight! I ask that you forgive me for bringing Jane," he gestured to the bundle of scarf next to him, "for she insisted that I would not be safe going on my own."  
Bruce stifled a laugh, and replied, "Oh no, that's fine. Please, come in. We were just about to...well...do something else..." he glanced behind him at the demolished game board.  
"I brought a bountiful supply of Asgard's finest wine!"  
Bruce laughed, "Thanks, but I think Tony has already had too much! Please, come in!" Thor stepped inside, and he added, "Oh, and Jane, I can prepare some coffee for you,"  
"Thanks." said a muffled voice from the inside of the scarf.  
"Loki!" Thor exclaimed, and ran to his brother, pulling him into a bone-crushing hug, "I cannot remember when I saw you last, for it seems like an eternity!"  
"You saw me last Monday," Loki grumbled, but made no attempt to wiggle out of Thor's embrace, for it was hopeless.  
Thor finally let go and turned to his fellow Avengers. "I brought wine." he said, bluntly, and sat on the couch.  
At the sound of all of the commotion, Clint entered the room, though he was a bit jittery around Loki. He cautiously sat on Thor's right side, while Loki sat on his left.  
When Thor noticed his unease, he laughed, "Fear not, for Loki does not bite!"  
"Don't give me ideas, brother." Loki grumbled.  
This only caused Clint to shrink even more.  
"I have an idea!" Steve exclaimed, trying to break the tension, "Why don't we watch a Christmas movie!"  
"You got any ideas, cap?" Tony asked.  
"Well, I always liked the movie 'Christmas in Connecticut',"  
"What?"  
Steve opened his mouth to say something, but quickly decided against it, "Never mind...you pick."  
Well, even in an intoxicated state, Tony knew better than to suggest watching "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer", so he randomly called out, "Muppets Christmas Carol!"  
"Why not?" Natasha shrugged, although Steve was very confused, "I haven't seen that one in ages!"  
"JARVIS!" Tony screamed, "PLAY MUPPETS CHRISTMAS CAROL ON THE MAIN SCREEN!"  
"Yes Mr. Stark, but might I ask that you hold off on the Asgardian wine," the same calm, British voice replied.  
"Don't tell me how to live my life you son of a (insert rude word of choice)!" Tony yelled back, and took a swig of Thor's gift.  
The huge television at the front of the room suddenly lit up with the menu of the movie. Felt puppets and christmas decorations danced around the screen, causing Steve to knit his eyebrows in confusion.  
"Wait," Clint cut in, "Isn't this movie for like...five year olds?"  
"Yes..." Tony said, with his words now being VERY slurred, "and we're just a bunch of five year olds now. Two of us wear capes, two of us wear spandex, I have a laser pointer, Bruce has hissy fits of death, and YOU don't shave your armpits."  
Natasha stifled a laugh, and carefully took the bottle away from Tony. "That might be a bit too much for now," she said, soothingly, and quickly gave Clint a reassuring pat on the knee.  
The movie began to play, and those who hadn't seen it before (Steve, Thor, and Loki) all sat on the edge of their seats in amazement. Under his breath, Steve was quoting lines from the original book, but Thor and Loki had never heard of the plot line in their life.  
Thor smiled to himself all throughout the movie. Scrooge, as he realized, somewhat resembled Loki, in a way of...well, not liking anyone. The god of mischief himself, however, was appalled by the muppets, especially the ghost of Christmas present, how jolly and...LARGE this creature was. The ghost almost resembled Volstagg, until it didn't eat any of Tiny Tim's meal. That also perplexed him. Why Tiny Tim was so...happy. The poor boy had the worst luck in the world, but never once complained, or pitied himself. This mortal holiday was full of...strange things.  
However, when the movie arrived at the part with the Ghost of Christmas future, Loki felt his blood run cold (if it didn't already). He had never seen anything more erie and provoking in all of the nine realms, not even in Niffleheim where spirits such as this roamed all of the time. Being in Scrooge's place, as Loki imagined, at least, must have been even worse, and with all of the ghosts! Especially Marley...seeing an old friend that was surely as dead as a stone suddenly come to life in some sort of appalling spectre had to be the most scarring, unnerving thing imaginable, and then being shown your OWN death, and your OWN grave! This certainly didn't seem like a movie for five year olds, considering Loki could hardly bear it. However, no one else seemed even the slightest bit affected throughout the entire film (despite Tony eventually falling asleep because of the amount of the alcohol he consumed).  
Finally, the movie ended happily, with Scrooge being a respectable, cheery fellow again, and the ending credits began to roll across the screen. The rest of the conscious Avengers decided that the party was over, the time being now creeping onto 11:00 pm, and began to rise from their seats. Loki did the same, and tried not to collapse from his knees being turned to jelly from the disturbing scenes in the film.  
They all said their quick, short "goodbye"s, and they filed out the door (leaving Tony still snoring on the couch, later to be an unpleasant surprise to Ms. Potts). Jane, who hadn't said much all night, began muttering to Thor about taking a cab back home, and Loki wondered himself how he was to get back to his hotel. The walk to the mansion hadn't been so bad because there was a decent amount of daylight, but now, the sky was as dark as ink. Sighing, he decided he would have to walk, considering no one in their right mind would give him a ride.

Finally, after feeling his way through the darkness back home, Loki stumbled inside the Hotel, and found his room. He unlocked the door with the card key, and took off his black coat and scarf. Still sighing, he flopped onto the unmade bed (the housekeeping must have not come by) and closed his eyes, just at the stroke of twelve on the clock tower by the church.  
"It took me that long to walk here," Loki thought, "Perhaps I'll have a good dream." suddenly, he shook away the thought. No way after that movie would he have a good dream for a few weeks now. Until then, his slumber would be packed with nightmare after nightmare, causing him to toss and turn until the blasted sunrise where he would remember the torture from the night before, and sigh some more. His entire life, it seemed, was a huge sigh. An exhale of cold breath. Needed briefly, and then disposed of. A long...sigh...  
Suddenly, his thoughts evaporated. A chill ran through the room. It was the chill one could only feel in Jotunheim, but Loki had never felt it. Now, he did. He wrapped himself in the sheets tighter, but the chill found its way to his bones, and shook him.  
"Hi." a voice suddenly said.  
Loki's eyes flew open, and he sat stiff as a board, straight up in bed. His stomach turned into a double-overhead-figure-eight-fisherman's-bird-glove knot as a light blue figure sat on the foot of his bed. The features gradually became more defined, until Loki could pinpoint exactly who it was, and his hand went over his mouth.  
"Long time no see." it said again, with a small chuckle.  
"That's impossible," Loki whispered, "I...you..."  
"Yeah, it is impossible, but it's happening! There are more important things right now, though. Do you remember my name?"  
All Loki could do was shake his head, for his lips were sealed shut again, and his heart threatened to beat so hard it would explode.  
"Agent Phil Coulson," the spectre said, cheerily, and bounced a little on the bed, "and you are Loki, son of Odin, son of Laufey, brother of Thor."  
"Yes, I know," Loki's words surprised himself, "why are you here?"  
"You will be visited by three ghosts..." he said, in a serious tone.

Loki could hardly believe it. "Really?" he asked.

"Nah, I just wanted to say Merry Christmas!" Phil exclaimed, but his eerie blue face fell, and he asked quietly, "you celebrate it, right?"

"Yeah, sure," Loki nodded, though regretted lying later. Being in the presence of someone he had personally slaughtered made Loki feel very awkward, for now, he didn't know what to say. 'Hey, Merry Christmas to you too, and I'm glad you're dead,' didn't seem very appropriate, or honest. Loki only did it to save himself, and if he didn't die, keep himself from being personally torn apart limb-by-limb by Thanos.  
Without realizing, Loki opened his mouth to say something, but Phil quickly interrupted, "Loki, no. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for threatening you, and I forgive you for...you know..." he gestured to the wound in his abdomen, which hadn't changed. Actually, he wore the same clothes as the day he died, only they were more...blue.  
"Thank you," Loki choked, "and I am sorry. You didn't deserve it."  
Phil glanced at the digital clock on the bedside table, and said, quickly, "I must go. I can only stay for so long. Tell Captain America I'm still his #1 f–" he was cut off as he entirely vanished from sight, with just a brief flash of light.  
"Merry Christmas," Loki whispered, and wiped the tear from his cheek.

**NOTE: This is just my Christmas special. Nothing too great, but a little fun for the holidays. Merry Christmas!**


End file.
